Wednesday, March 16, 2011

By Request: Dead Deer Ahead

The dust from the upheaval of my life is beginning to settle. Consequently, good blog material is getting more difficult to come by. Turns out even I am a little bored with the random thoughts in my head. So I love the idea of blogging by request.

Casi, Amy? I know you're lurking out there. Send me any edits if I stray too far from the truth!

(Boneheaded blogging moment...I Googled for images of Dead Deer. The photo above is the only one that doesn't turn my stomach)

Conference weekend October 2000 (maybe? not exactly sure on the year? Amy, when did you get married, we were all still single at the time). Cousins Casi, Amy and I set off for the Friday evening college football match-up between BYU and USU. My brother was on the team at the time, and that always made the games that much better. We won (I think, we usually do) and then left Logan for conference weekend at Uncle Rogers cabin and 2 days of indulging on Aunt Janet's cooking!

It was late and dark and I'd never driven that particular canyon before. Casi was riding shotgun and Amy had fallen asleep in the back seat. I was piloting with loud music and no seatbelt (I never wore one). As I approached a curve, I inexplicable put my seatbelt on and took mental note of the mile marker. As we rounded the bend, I was faced with a very large deer lying in my lane. My mind immediate barked the command to brake and swerve, so logically I floored it and kept the steering wheel in place!

We popped that Civic hard over the top of the massive speed bump and I pulled off to the side of the road. Jolted from her sleep, Amy popped up in the back asking if she had, "just heard the sound of bones crunching?" I dreaded getting out of the car to evaluate the damage and that hesitation probably saved me as a little red car came cruising around following my tracks...but without the same luck. They took the hit much harder and came to a smoky stop some distance ahead of us. I did a quick survey and determined that no noticeable damage had been done.

So, as Good Samaritans would, we rolled down to the red car to see what kind of help we could offer the passengers of the smoking vehicle. As they stumbled out, beer can in hand, I asked if they were okay, to which the driver replied, "What do you think?" I then let them know that we had a cell phone and could call for help, which was apparently the last thing they wanted me to do as they quickly got back in the car and took off at a crazy speed. (I suspect the beer cans had something to do with the avoidy behavior?).

Well now there were two things to report to the authorities...the carcass road block and the kamikaze idiots fleeing the scene. I dialed up 911 and felt so awesome about knowing details down to the mile marker and license plate number. The operator answered and I explained that there was a major dead hazard in the middle of the road and a major drunk/damaged hazard flying down the road, to which he responded, "What do you want me to do about it?"

I felt so deflated. Turns out that being helpful isn't so appreciated in the middle of the night, in the middle of nowhere.

So we regrouped and kept on going. I couldn't believe that my car was working just fine! We pulled up to the cabin at some absurd hour, reported a brief version of the story to the parentals, and finally went to sleep.

As soon as I awoke, I ran out to check out the scene. I was greeted by Peaches (Casi, that was the dog's name, right?) grubbing on the blood and guts splattered up in the wheel wells.

While I never had to do any repairs, it did take a very long time to eliminate the remnants of that night (weirdest phenomena, bees and wasps were very attracted to it?!)

1 comment:

Bench Family said...

Ok, you're right, you caught me I am stalking you. You are hilarious! This post made me laugh! When I saw the title I thought, "huh, kinda reminds me of the time we hit a dead deer in Kim's car" So happy to read that it was, in fact, about the time we hit dead deer in Kim's Car!! What a fun story to remember. Although, I still feel badly that we didn't go to the car wash with you to try to wash the carcass off of your undercarriage.

I got married in June of 2000 so it had to be before then. I'm not sure Greg was even in the picture when this happened.

Miss you Kim. I think we're headed out to Utah in June this year. We need to catch up... a girls' night at Hale Theater or something.